【转帖】郭敬明：刻下来的幸福时光（图文书）

sadsack 发表于 2008-5-29 22:56

第一章郭敬明着鞋垫绘
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上海最近的天气变化得很厉害，昨天我还穿着短袖的白色T恤， 今天我就又裹起黑色的长风衣了。
 
 
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[ 本帖最后由 sadsack 于 2008-5-29 23:50 编辑 ]

sadsack 发表于 2008-5-29 22:58

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我骑着单车穿行在人迹稀少的上大校园里，上大里面90%的学生都是上海人， 一到放假的时候走得人去楼空，每次我在周末的时候都会觉得没有比这里更适合拍鬼片的地方了。
 
 
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今天在下雨，雨从头顶上笼罩下来，不是很大，却让人觉得伤感。
 
 
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我的头发上全是细小的雨滴，从超市门口路过的时候我看到自己在落地窗中的影子， 像是白发苍苍，一瞬间我就笑了。
 
 
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白色的水泥地上一条长长的刹车痕迹。雨。绿色的树。骑在单车上头发凌乱的我。感觉像一支精美的MV。
 
 
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sadsack 发表于 2008-5-29 23:01

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第二章郭敬明着鞋垫绘 
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以前我很怕听到苍老这个词语，从初中我就害怕听。 其实仔细想想一个十四五岁的孩子头脑中是不应该有苍老这个词的， 这个年纪的孩子应该想的是麦当劳和可乐，CD机和永远考不完的试。
 
 
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那个时候我和小A在一起，我生活的全部重量似乎就在他的身上。 因为对我而言，他是一个长者，他教我所有的东西，也纵容我所有的事情。 我可以在不想上课的时候就睡觉，趴在木头课桌上晒太阳，鼻子里是木头的香味。 我总是很沉地睡过去，因为我知道小A有笔记，我只要说说就可以借到。
 
 
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我和小A就曾经讨论过苍老的问题，我说我这个人，肯定是会很早就苍老的， 在所有人都还在挥霍自己的青春的时候，我就已经站成一种模糊而氤氲的姿势了， 如同夕阳一样，一点一点喷薄成最后的色泽，然后就暗淡下去。
 
 
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其实苍老是每个人的事情,没有人躲得掉, 就如同一条湍急的河,轻浮的东西似乎一直飘着, 而沉重的东西,却是最早地沉下去--- 当我说这番话时我和小A坐在我家的那条最繁华的街道的天桥上, 我们坐在栏杆上喝可乐。
 
 
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我平时都是用最玩世不恭的生活态度来最严肃地生活，而很少说出这么有哲理的话， 所以说完我就笑了，然后继续痞子般地说，人类一思考，上帝就发笑，我就是上帝， 看我笑得多灿烂。说完还吹了个口哨。</DIV></DIV></DIV></DIV></DIV>

sadsack 发表于 2008-5-29 23:04

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小A没有转过头来看我，只是淡淡地笑了，他总是这个样子，似乎永远平静， 无论是一朵花在他面前绽放，还是一座城市在他面前倾覆。
 
 
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他说，我就不会，我是个永远都不会苍老的人。
 
 
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我当时就笑了，我用我的笑来表达我的不屑。 小A伸过手来摸我的头发，像在摸一个孩子。
而在三年后的今天，在上海这个光怪陆离的城市， 在每天对远在日本的小A的怀念情绪里，我终于明白了小A的话，他说的是真的。
 
 
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当十九岁的我已经学会了留着长而凌乱的头发，学会了打耳洞，学会了很商业化的笑容，学会了怎么逗女孩子开心，学会了对喜欢的人微笑，对不喜欢的人也微笑的时候，小A依然是那个样子－－穿着干净的白色衬衣，粗布裤子，清爽的头发，眼睛依然清澈，笑起来如同十六岁一样明亮，对自己喜欢的人说很多的话，对自己不喜欢的人面无表情。
 
 
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我写过一段话，我说我总是不厌其烦地回头张望，伫足，然后时光就扔下我轰轰烈烈地朝前奔跑。 其实我写错了，其实是时光的洪流卷过来，我被带走了。
 
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sadsack 发表于 2008-5-29 23:05

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被时光带着一路流淌冲刷，冲过了四季，越过了山河，穿过了明媚的风和忧愁的雨。
 
 
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而小A却一直留在我的十七岁，一直站在我的回忆里，站在我的思念中， 站成了一棵会微笑的樱花树，一直飘零。
 
 
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sadsack 发表于 2008-5-29 23:10

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第三章郭敬明着鞋垫绘 
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昨天晚上熬夜，今天一直睡觉，中途不断有短信冲进我的手机，我都是拿起来模糊地看看， 然后删除，然后继续裹着被子睡。中午的时候我收到一条短信，然后就再也睡不着了。
 
 
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短信是微微发的，内容是：最近非典严重，你不要死了，给我活着。
我突然想起自己已经好几个月没有和她联系了。断了电话，断了短信， 我们独自生活在各自的生活圈里，高兴，难过，失望，沮丧， 然后满心喜悦地等待希望中的明天。
 
 
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我问微微，我说最近怎么都没你的消息，我还以为你死了。
微微说，我这种人，所有的人都死了，我都会苟且地活着。
我握着手机说不出话来。窗外的雨还是那么大，我突然想起我和微微在高三听的一首歌， 歌里唱，下起雨，是天为谁哭了？谁为谁哭了？
 
 
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不知道是睡眠不足还是怎么，我觉得周围的空气开始微微晃动起来，我觉得自己是在一艘船上， 周围是浪涛、风雨，以及时光的洪流。
我忘记了回短信，其实是我不知道怎么去回，我不知道怎么对微微讲，讲我的心痛， 讲我的思念，讲我对高三时光一遍一遍的追忆。
只是明天总是要到来的，风已经吹起来了，三月的桃花和杨花。 张悦然说，她们一起倒卷进三月的高草里。
 
 
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sadsack 发表于 2008-5-29 23:13

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第四章郭敬明着鞋垫绘 
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我喜欢站在山岗上，看整个城市匍匐在我的脚下， 看所有人的悲喜夹杂着尘世的喧嚣一起冲上高高的苍穹，看阳光笔直地洒下来， 镂空所有人的躯体和灵魂。
 
 
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这个时候我会想起所有哀伤的灵魂，他们在云朵上的歌唱。
 
 
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四川是个有很多山的地方，九寨沟，峨眉，青城。 我喜欢和朋友一起背着很大的行囊走在那些青色的发凉的石板路和台阶上， 汗水，可乐，睡袋，相机，DV，以及散落在每个角落的我们的情感和思想。
 
 
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我只要一回忆，就会想起我和小A在峨眉山金顶上裹着毯子坐在窗台上听雪花纷纷扬扬地落满我们的十七岁。 我就会想起我和小A在西安喧嚣的路边买工艺粗糙的兵马俑，如同买回一种时光的见证。 我就会想起我和小A去很多偏僻的乡村，看到那些乡下孩子纯真的脸和干净的笑， 他们躲避我们的相机，他们说这是古怪的盒子，人会被装进去。
 
 
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我会想起我和小A在石头城，我看到小A站在桥上，风吹过他的头发如同一个从宋朝缓缓而来的词人。
 
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sadsack 发表于 2008-5-29 23:14

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而如今，小A在日本，行走在早稻田的风里。他告诉我：总有一天，我要再次背起行囊， 和你一起出发，看没有看过的山，走没有走过的水，挥霍没有挥霍完的青春，纪念永远无法纪念的纪念。
于是我就相信了，如同相信了一个神话，而神话最让人膜拜的地方，就在于它的不可相信。
 
 
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而我在上海，在这个中国东方最繁华的城市，在这个长江冲积出来的巨大平原上， 再也找不到山崖，找不到让我居高临下的地方。我曾经站在东方明珠的最高层， 望出去，却看到无穷无尽的欲望。
这个城市没有草长莺飞的传说，它永远活在现实里面，快速的鼓点，匆忙的身影， 麻木的眼神，虚假的笑容，而我正在被同化，这是多么幸运的事情啊。
我对着上苍流下了感激的泪水。
 
 
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泪水里面是座小小的冢，埋葬了我的十七岁，我的单车，我的摇滚CD， 我的笑容，我的一去不再回来的夏日。
 
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sadsack 发表于 2008-5-29 23:15

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第五章郭敬明着鞋垫绘 
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让我把文字弄得飘逸一点，清淡一点，让我们开始感受我曾经拥有，而你们正在拥有的青春。
 
 
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sadsack 发表于 2008-5-29 23:17

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第六章郭敬明着鞋垫绘 
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我和小A喜欢在我们十六岁的那个夏天沿着城市自在地走，因为他已经离开， 回到四川对他来讲如同回来探望。而我，却是一直生活在这个地方， 看着自己的时光一点一点和这个城市纠缠在一起，彼此枝繁叶茂地缠绕，再也分不开。
 
 
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那个夏天我和小A站在马路边上，看顺着墙角奔跑的风。
 
 
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在傍晚的时候我们两个穿着四百多块钱一件的纯白色T恤坐在充满油烟味的路边摊上吃牛肉面。 那个老板很热情地和我们说了很多话，我也和他讲话，而小A只是在旁边笑，笑得很清澈很好看， 如同一个孩子般明亮奢侈的笑容。
 
 
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三年后的今天，我依然可以清晰地回忆起来这个场景，周围很多的车很多的人， 尽管是在傍晚，阳光依然很辣。
 
 
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然后我们会去看电影。爆米花，可乐，薯条，看喜剧的时候大声地笑， 看艺术片的时候彼此沉默，黑暗中谁都不知道谁的表情。
 
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【转帖】郭敬明：刻下来的幸福时光（图文书）