八卦掌付 发表于 2015-7-1 07:15

凤凰台上忆吹箫*春天里

本帖最后由 八卦掌付 于 2015-7-1 07:49 编辑 <br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(33, 33, 33); font-family: 'Microsoft YaHei', sans-serif; font-size: 16px; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 27.2000007629395px;">《凤凰台上忆吹箫&nbsp; &nbsp; 春天里》</span><br style="color: rgb(33, 33, 33); font-family: 'Microsoft YaHei', sans-serif; font-size: 16px; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 27.2000007629395px;"><span style="color: rgb(33, 33, 33); font-family: 'Microsoft YaHei', sans-serif; font-size: 16px; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 27.2000007629395px;">(作者&nbsp; &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;八卦掌付)</span><br style="color: rgb(33, 33, 33); font-family: 'Microsoft YaHei', sans-serif; font-size: 16px; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 27.2000007629395px;"><br style="color: rgb(33, 33, 33); font-family: 'Microsoft YaHei', sans-serif; font-size: 16px; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 27.2000007629395px;"><span style="color: rgb(33, 33, 33); font-family: 'Microsoft YaHei', sans-serif; font-size: 16px; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 27.2000007629395px;">一夜情长,千年恨短,无端多少春秋。</span><br style="color: rgb(33, 33, 33); font-family: 'Microsoft YaHei', sans-serif; font-size: 16px; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 27.2000007629395px;"><span style="color: rgb(33, 33, 33); font-family: 'Microsoft YaHei', sans-serif; font-size: 16px; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 27.2000007629395px;">又恰似、红尘滚滚,旧梦难留。</span><br style="color: rgb(33, 33, 33); font-family: 'Microsoft YaHei', sans-serif; font-size: 16px; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 27.2000007629395px;"><span style="color: rgb(33, 33, 33); font-family: 'Microsoft YaHei', sans-serif; font-size: 16px; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 27.2000007629395px;">相逢天涯海角,都淡淡、暖了心头。</span><br style="color: rgb(33, 33, 33); font-family: 'Microsoft YaHei', sans-serif; font-size: 16px; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 27.2000007629395px;"><span style="color: rgb(33, 33, 33); font-family: 'Microsoft YaHei', sans-serif; font-size: 16px; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 27.2000007629395px;">更珍贵,亦师亦友,几世同修。</span><span style="color: rgb(33, 33, 33); font-family: 'Microsoft YaHei', sans-serif; font-size: 16px; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 27.2000007629395px;"><br></span><br style="color: rgb(33, 33, 33); font-family: 'Microsoft YaHei', sans-serif; font-size: 16px; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 27.2000007629395px;"><span style="color: rgb(33, 33, 33); font-family: 'Microsoft YaHei', sans-serif; font-size: 16px; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 27.2000007629395px;"><br></span><span style="color: rgb(33, 33, 33); font-family: 'Microsoft YaHei', sans-serif; font-size: 16px; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 27.2000007629395px;">休叹人间况味,春天里,吹箫弄玉红楼。</span><br style="color: rgb(33, 33, 33); font-family: 'Microsoft YaHei', sans-serif; font-size: 16px; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 27.2000007629395px;"><span style="color: rgb(33, 33, 33); font-family: 'Microsoft YaHei', sans-serif; font-size: 16px; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 27.2000007629395px;">最妙处,桃开惬意,梨送温柔。</span><br style="color: rgb(33, 33, 33); font-family: 'Microsoft YaHei', sans-serif; font-size: 16px; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 27.2000007629395px;"><span style="color: rgb(33, 33, 33); font-family: 'Microsoft YaHei', sans-serif; font-size: 16px; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 27.2000007629395px;">但觉繁华错落,未曾闻、风也含羞。</span><br style="color: rgb(33, 33, 33); font-family: 'Microsoft YaHei', sans-serif; font-size: 16px; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 27.2000007629395px;"><span style="color: rgb(33, 33, 33); font-family: 'Microsoft YaHei', sans-serif; font-size: 16px; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 27.2000007629395px;">且看我,轻狂半世不休?</span><p></p><div><span style="color: rgb(33, 33, 33); font-family: 'Microsoft YaHei', sans-serif; font-size: 16px; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 27.2000007629395px;">http://www.xiami.com/widget/0_175041,_360_260_CD5C5C_808080_1/multiPlayer.swf<br></span></div>

三笑 发表于 2015-7-1 08:42

情意缠绵、婉约流畅,炼字虚实恰到好处,精华之作,下片起句用休字与结句休字在视觉上和读感上不是很好,但是瑕不掩瑜~~赏学优秀词作~~问好斑斑!

八卦掌付 发表于 2015-7-1 09:19

三笑 发表于 2015-7-1 08:42
情意缠绵、婉约流畅,炼字虚实恰到好处,精华之作,下片起句用休字与结句休字在视觉上和读感上不是很好,但 ...

谢谢专业点评。

独行剑客 发表于 2015-7-2 10:52

欣赏八卦老师精彩力作

八卦掌付 发表于 2015-7-2 11:11

独行剑客 发表于 2015-7-2 10:52
欣赏八卦老师精彩力作

谢谢您:handshake
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