不得不看的魔鬼词典
<p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; white-space: pre-wrap; line-height: 2em; "><font style="font-size:20px;;"><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><font color="#333399"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; ">电视剧：插在广告中间的节目。</span><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-family: Calibri; "><font color="#333399" style="font-size: 20px; "> </font></span></span></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "><font color="#333399" style="font-size: 20px; ">报复：狗咬了你，于是你就去咬狗。</font></span></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-family: Calibri; "><font color="#333399" style="font-size: 20px; "> </font></span></span></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "><font color="#333399" style="font-size: 20px; ">放屁：为了自己的健康而污染空气。</font></span></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-family: Calibri; "><font color="#333399" style="font-size: 20px; "> </font></span></span></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><font color="#333399"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; ">家庭就是年轻时去经营，到老了开始收利息的地方。</span><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-family: Calibri; "><font color="#333399" style="font-size: 20px; "> </font></span></span></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><font color="#333399"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; ">人的喜新厌旧只有三十天，所以新婚燕尔只有蜜“月”。</span><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-family: Calibri; "><font color="#333399" style="font-size: 20px; "> </font></span></span></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "><font color="#333399" style="font-size: 20px; ">人的忍耐最久只有三十天，所以工作以“月”薪为准。</font></span></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-family: Calibri; "><font color="#333399" style="font-size: 20px; "> </font></span></span></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><font color="#333399"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; ">完全相反的个性，结婚时叫“互补”；离婚时叫“个性不合”。</span><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-family: Calibri; "><font color="#333399" style="font-size: 20px; "> </font></span></span></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><font color="#333399"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; ">暴发户的特色就是：明明是“土”，偏偏自以为“士”。</span><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-family: Calibri; "><font color="#333399" style="font-size: 20px; "> </font></span></span></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "><font color="#333399" style="font-size: 20px; ">在马路上：开车无难事，只怕有“新人”。</font></span></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-family: Calibri; "><font color="#333399" style="font-size: 20px; "> </font></span></span></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "><font color="#333399" style="font-size: 20px; ">敬人者人恒敬之：在世风日下的今天，唯有在酒席间才能见到这种美德。</font></span></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-family: Calibri; "><font color="#333399" style="font-size: 20px; "> </font></span></span></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "><font color="#333399" style="font-size: 20px; ">恋爱时的花费，证明爱情的“真实”；结婚后的开支，证明婚姻的“无价”。</font></span></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-family: Calibri; "><font color="#333399" style="font-size: 20px; "> </font></span></span></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><font color="#333399"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; ">友谊：这是一艘船，在风平浪静的日子可以载两个人；在浊浪滔天的时候只能由一个人乘坐。</span><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-family: Calibri; "><font color="#333399" style="font-size: 20px; "> </font></span></span></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><font color="#333399"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; ">可爱：可怜没人爱。</span><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-family: Calibri; "><font color="#333399" style="font-size: 20px; "> </font></span></span></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><font color="#333399"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; ">气质：孩子气，神经质。</span><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-family: Calibri; "><font color="#333399" style="font-size: 20px; "> </font></span></span></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><font color="#333399"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; ">头头是道：头头讲的才是道理。</span><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-family: Calibri; "><font color="#333399" style="font-size: 20px; "> </font></span></span></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><font color="#333399"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; ">老板：老板着脸。</span><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-family: Calibri; "><font color="#333399" style="font-size: 20px; "> </font></span></span></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><font color="#333399"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; ">天才：天生的蠢才。</span><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-family: Calibri; "><font color="#333399" style="font-size: 20px; "> </font></span></span></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><font color="#333399"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; ">偶像：呕吐的对象。</span><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-family: Calibri; "><font color="#333399" style="font-size: 20px; "> </font></span></span></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><font color="#333399"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; ">耐看：耐着性子看。</span><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-family: Calibri; "><font color="#333399" style="font-size: 20px; "> </font></span></span></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><font color="#333399"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; ">善良：善变又没天良。</span><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-family: Calibri; "><font color="#333399" style="font-size: 20px; "> </font></span></span></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><font color="#333399"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; ">情圣：情场剩下来的。</span><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-family: Calibri; "><font color="#333399" style="font-size: 20px; "> </font></span></span></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><font color="#333399"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; ">健谈：贱到什么都谈。</span><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-family: Calibri; "><font color="#333399" style="font-size: 20px; "> </font></span></span></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><font color="#333399"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; ">老样子：老了的样子。</span><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-family: Calibri; "><font color="#333399" style="font-size: 20px; "> </font></span></span></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><font color="#333399"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; ">潇洒：“笑”得挺“傻”。</span><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-family: Calibri; "><font color="#333399" style="font-size: 20px; "> </font></span></span></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><font color="#333399"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; ">讨厌：讨人喜欢百看不厌。</span><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-family: Calibri; "><font color="#333399" style="font-size: 20px; "> </font></span></span></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><font color="#333399"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; ">不错：长成这样真的不是你的错。</span><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "></span></font></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-family: Calibri; "><font color="#333399" style="font-size: 20px; "> </font></span></span></p><p style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1.5em; line-height: 2em; "><span style="max-width: 100%; "><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 18px; "><font color="#333399" style="font-size: 20px; ">贤惠：闲在家里什么都不会；嫌东嫌西你最会。</font></span></span></p>
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