人见人爱的老婆
<p class=MsoNormal><strong><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">【缺点】</span></strong><strong><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US> <o:p></o:p></span></strong></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'"> </span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US> </span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">今天看老婆</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US>QQ</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">签名写着：老公，要是我有什么做的不好，做的不对，做的不到位的地方，你一定要和我说啊，千万别憋在心里，反正我也不会改，别再把你憋出什么毛病······好老婆！</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><strong><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">【强大】</span></strong><strong><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></strong></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'"> </span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312"> </span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">正在看非诚勿扰，突然问旁边的老婆：非诚勿扰为什么有</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US>24</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">个女嘉宾？老婆不加思索的回答：</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US>1</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">小时</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US>1</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">个······我勒个去，真强大！</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><strong><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">【当初】</span></strong><strong><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></strong></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US> </span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">当初是我老婆追我的。</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US> </span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">老婆：帅哥，有女朋友吗？</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US> <o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US> </span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">我：有。</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US> <o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US> </span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">老婆：介意换一个吗？</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US> <o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US> </span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">我：介意。</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US> <o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US> </span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">老婆：介意多一个吗？</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US> <o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US> </span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">我：</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'MS Gothic'; mso-hansi-font-family: 'MS Gothic'; mso-bidi-font-family: 'MS Gothic'">······</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">不介意。</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US> </span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">于是她就变了我老婆了。</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><strong><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">【上当】</span></strong><strong><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></strong></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US> </span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">吃过晚饭在客厅看报纸，问老婆：你洗碗了吗？</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US> <o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US> </span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">老婆严肃的说：老公，你应该这样问，宝贝，我去帮你洗碗</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US> </span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">吧！然后我再说：“老公，已经洗好了。”这样显着多好······</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US> </span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">于是，我：宝贝，我去帮你洗碗吧！</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US> <o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US> </span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">老婆：恩，去吧。</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><strong><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">【体力】</span></strong><strong><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></strong></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'"> </span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312"> </span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">跟老婆一起看电视。肚子饿得咕噜了一下，</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US> </span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">老婆：老公你是不是饿了啊？</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US> <o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US> </span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">我感动地点点头。</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US> </span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">老婆心疼地说：老公，你饿了就先去睡吧。坐着很浪费体力的！</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><strong><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">【“二”得可爱】</span></strong><strong><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></strong></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'"> 昨天去北京出差，上飞机前给媳妇发了条短信：我登机了。</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'"> 这二货媳妇回了条：吾皇万岁万岁万万岁</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><strong><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">【呆老婆】</span></strong><strong><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></strong></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'"> 老婆和几个朋友逛街，没看到是红灯就过斑马线，交警咆哮：“喂，你们几个！”</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'"> 居然呆老婆怯怯地说：“我们六个···六个···”</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><strong><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">【二货老婆】</span></strong><strong><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></strong></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'"> </span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312"> </span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">老婆最近才看完“第一滴血”，我告诉她还有第二部，叫她自己网上搜搜。</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US> </span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">半小时后老婆发飙说搜不到，我过去一看，丫的在搜“第二滴血”······</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><strong><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">【阴谋】</span></strong><strong><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></strong></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'"> </span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312"> </span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">中午老婆开车</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US>10</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">分钟来到我公司楼下，请我吃了一顿</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US>40</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">元的午餐。把找回的</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US>10</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">元钱放到我的钱包里让我自己买点零食吃，顺手拿走了我的工资卡。我就知道，这从一开始就是个阴谋！</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><strong><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">【报复】</span></strong><strong><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></strong></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'"> </span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312"> </span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">我和老婆闹别扭，就在小房间睡觉。她拿把大剪刀给我的蚊帐剪了个大口子，说：让蚊子咬死你！过了大概一个小时，老婆拿着透明胶来了，把刚刚剪坏的蚊帐黏在一起了！我的心啊，这个感动的啊，心想老婆就是刀子嘴豆腐心，还是很心疼自己的！我刚要说什么，她自言自语：蚊子进去的差不多的了，别让他们跑了。</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><strong><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">【进水老婆】</span></strong><strong><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></strong></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US> </span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">“老公，为什么我每回洗完澡都觉得自己特别美？”</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US> </span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">“因为脑子进水了。”</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US> </span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">“滚！”</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><strong><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">【白手起家】</span></strong><strong><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></strong></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'"> 老婆又买了大包小包衣服。我：老婆你能不能不要太浪费。多少富翁都是省着省着才能白手起家！老婆连连点头说：对呀，不把这些钱花掉，你怎么白手起家呢？老公我花钱是为了你好。</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><strong><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">【电脑坏了】</span></strong><strong><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></strong></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'"> </span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312"> </span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">老婆打电话说电脑坏了，让我赶紧回家给她修。我问她怎么坏了，她说提示要按</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US>F1</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">，但是按了也没用。我回到家老婆演示给我看，电脑提示按</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US>F1</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">的时候老婆一只手按住</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US>F</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">，一只手按住</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US>1</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">。</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><strong><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">【冷宫】</span></strong><strong><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></strong></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'"> </span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312"> </span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">昨晚奇葩老婆忽然对我说：皇上，臣妾有一事相求！我：但说无妨。老婆：恳请将臣妾打入冷宫，臣妾受不了了，这天太</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US>TM</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">热了。</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><strong><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">【做饭】</span></strong><strong><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></strong></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'"> 老婆不会做饭。但很努力的在学。一天尝试着做家常豆腐。那个味道实在</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US>...</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">我后来无意翻开她当天日志，是这么写的：今天给老公做家常豆腐，除了颜色差点，味道咸了点，豆腐有点糊以外，其它还都不错。继续加油！</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><strong><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">【梁祝】</span></strong><strong><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></strong></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'"> </span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312"> </span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">我和老婆在看《梁祝》忧伤的音乐中梁和祝化作蝴蝶翩翩起舞，我不免被他们惊天地、泣鬼神的爱情感动，突然老婆问我：他们是白痴么？我：为什么。她一本正经说：蝴蝶生命只有</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US>7</span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">天，为什么要变蝴蝶穷得瑟呢？如果是我就变俩王八，这样结局才是完美的。</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'"> </span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312"> </span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">我只想说，变的时候不要叫上我。</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><strong><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">【偷吃】</span></strong><strong><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US> <o:p></o:p></span></strong></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'"> </span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312"> </span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">一次晚上正在面馆埋头吃面的时候停电了。我：你害怕吗？老婆点头说是，于是我很男人地说：别怕，有我在。老婆捧紧她的面碗说：“就是因为你在我才怕，我怕你趁我看不见的时候偷吃我碗里的面。”</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US> </span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">然后在黑暗中，四周一阵喷面声。</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US> <o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class=MsoNormal><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US> </span><span style="FONT-FAMILY: 楷体_GB2312; FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'">其实，生活中多点二妻幽默多！</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 楷体_GB2312" lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></span></p> 躺着看看真不错,我好像不是二妻.
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